Marriage...and going all the way

I'm just thinking that heterosexuals take the whole marriage thing way, way too seriously...and way too casually at the same time. Little girls are brain-washed into thinking that they have to get a husband, that their wedding day is going to be their "special" day and the most important day of their lives...ick.

My friend Nathan nearly married a harridan who was incredibly hateful toward his 8-year old daughter. This gal has three children by her failed marriage, and there was no way she was going to give Gracie any motherly attention. When I first asked him how things were going, he got all excited and said that he had been thinking about things and was going to ask the woman to marry him.

Ooof. I suggested he wait a bit, see how they get along, see what happens when they've blended families for a time...so he moved her and her kids into his house.

They trashed his house, filthed it up, and showed him a total lack of respect. The woman takes her own career much too seriously to give any thought to Nathan's. She likes to shop, and she drained his bank account with her old debts and some new ones. She broke his mother's heart, took his truck and made his dog fat. To top it all off, she continued to show blatant favoritism toward her own children, especially her youngest daughter who is just a year younger than little Gracie. It broke Nathan's heart to hear the woman and her daughter giggling and sharing in the next room while he tucked his little girl into her quiet bed at night.

Well, during one discussion with Nathan (prior to the move-in) we were talking about his daughter, who is the center of his world. He exclaimed that her wedding day would be the happiest day of his life, and punched the air with his fist in anticipated delight.

"A wedding is fine," I offered, "but isn't it more important that the person she chooses to spend her life with, if she chooses to spend it with someone, loves her and cares about her? and what if she can't marry that person, because it's against the law? Isn't it more important that she grow up with coping skills and social skills and the ability to be happy in life?"

I love me some Nathan. He's always happy to explore new ideas.